A frienemy is that confounding blend of a friend and an enemy. In business, the frienemy is best known for saying all the right things and doing all the wrong ones. Spinning meetings out of control with irrelevant questions or tangential diatribes, splintering teams and causing discord by ferrying ill will back and forth between disparate groups, smiling at you and nodding in feigned acquiescence all the while, frienemies are the hobgoblins of productivity. Sharp leaders intent on moving their organization toward a brighter future quickly recognize these black clouds looming over the path to success, patiently waiting to rain on their parade.

It is not enough to simplycategorize those surrounding and involved in an initiative as friends, enemies, or frienemies. Leaders must determine an appropriate strategy for each group. For  frienemies, step one is to objectively assess the downside risk to ignoring them in hopes that they either go away or cave in to the positive influence of the “friends.” This is not a time to get caught up in ego and insecurity. A leader does not have to be liked or supported by everyone all the time in order to be effective. Driven by a need for approval, pursuing a turn-around campaign to win the heart and mind of a frienemy could be a fruitless waste of energy.

However, given the objectives you are trying to achieve, if an honest assessment of the situation leads to the conclusion that the frienemy is a big enough risk to warrant an investment of time and attention, there are ways to press a fine wine out of sour grapes.

The frienemy to friend undertaking begins with a mile long walk in the other person’s shoes. Think about what keeps this person up at night; this gives you a better understanding of their motivation. Then, consider how they benefit from their agenda. Why are they not bought-in to the initiative? What do they stand to gain if your objectives are not met?

Now, comes the hard part. Armed with new-found insight into the mind of the frienemy, you have to find an area around which to grant this person your trust. Influential leaders know that they must trust in order to be trusted. Ralph Waldo Emerson eloquently stated, “Trust men and they will be true to you; treat them greatly and they will show themselves great.” Easy enough to accomplish with friends. Painful at best with frienemies; but necessary nonetheless. Ralph and I are not suggesting that you share your garage door code with this person. Start with small steps that move you closer to common ground and mutual respect.

Consider ways you can leverage this person’s strengths while also assuaging their concerns. As Booker T. Washington said, “Few things can help an individual more than to place responsibility on him, and to let him know that you trust him.”

If you have other strategies for handling frienemies or a frienemy to friend success story, please share in the comments section!

credit: DELL

 Since the dawn of communication, man has been involved in the practice of content marketing.  The level of brand engagement that resulted from the uttering of those first staccato grunts in caves or around fires is unclear, but there was sharing, the message was behavior-driven and the content was geared toward a target audience.  Nowadays, whether you realize it or not, if you are actively involved in pursuing business on social media, then you are a content marketer.  This might not be the work you signed on for when you created your LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter accounts, launched your blog, or uploaded that first virtual commercial on to YouTube, but it is part of your job description today.

Business people and companies are competing for eyeballs like never before.  You don’t have to be a search engine savant to know that the Internet is swollen with content.  There is a lot of noise in the cloud.  The challenge lies in getting found, getting noticed and getting known.  Consider those that followed their dreams and staked their claims during the California Gold Rush.  They spent hours upon hours sifting through trays of earth just to find a small nugget.  The nugget was always there; the prospector’s tray just had to be in the right place.  Such is the case with your incredible article, white paper, blog post, landing page, video, or podcast.  Position it well and the right audience will find it.

Although the origin of the term is difficult to pinpoint, content marketing is now a vital entry in the mainstream social vocabulary.  I remember first hearing it in 2007, shortly after I swapped out my Website copywriter’s shingle for that of the LinkedIn consultant.  Today, content marketing is an industry unto itself, a sub-discipline of Internet science, and a staple strategy of social business.  I am amazed at how much content marketing is directed toward, well, content marketing.

 So what are the steps to becoming an effective content marketer?  Glad you asked.

Create a Visibility Strategy

 An all-out assault on the search engines doesn’t guarantee the delivery of a steady stream of spend-ready clients to your virtual doorstep.  Well-executed content marketing is inbound, yes, but who arrives is as important—if not more so—than how many.  Taking your offerings across multiple platforms and appealing to a wide variety of tastes and personalities within (and external to) your target audience will allow you to be a more versatile influencer and allow you to go viral in the right circles.  Build your content portfolio methodically. Depending on the context of your messaging, not all platforms will work.  First, decide what you wish to accomplish with your content marketing objectives.  Who do you most want to reach?  Set some parameters for topic, theme and style, keyword judiciously, and post accordingly.

 Be Compelling and Relevant

Ours is an attention deficit society, one that is constantly demanding injections of fresh, topical content.  Given the accelerated timeline of social media—unique in that it can move light years in a single day—you won’t get much of a chance to and engage prospective clients unless you compel them at the front gate.  People are fickle.  Much as they might give you a courtesy scan, or even go a paragraph or two deep on what you have to offer, if you can’t keep ‘em interested, they’re out.  Moreover, the shelf life of a given post, update, article or tweet is fleeting at best.  Don’t let your output go stale.  Regular content flow ensures that your brand stays in front of people and, over time, you will get noticed.  Good writing, persuasive or otherwise, has an attractive force operating beneath the surface.  It does not happen without practice, purpose and focus. 

Don’t Sound Contrived

Not to downplay the importance of keyword density, but often, people will dilute their message by paying too much attention to coming up high in a specific search category and bombard their piece with certain words or phrases.  Yes, write for Google, but also write for your brand.  People recognize when a piece of content has been doctored for search.  Keyword spamming, or excessive mention of specific terms, is unnatural and actually works to your detriment.  In social, you have to give to get.  You’re going up against people and firms who want to be found in identical searches.  Decide on the text that you want to go after hard, and let the rest go. 

Devise an Appropriate Real World Strategy

Whereas content always has and always will be king, it’s the level of engagement that determines who wears the crown.  These days, it’s about reaching potential customers and clients on an emotional level.  Creating a favorable first impression, and converting that response into a profitable call to action, is the goal of any value-added content marketing campaign.  Ultimately, the dynamic shifts and you move from a position of content management to relationship management.   Over time, you will achieve brand recognition. Social networking, and its requisite skill sets, is the driver.  How you handle inquiries and advance conversations in the physical world will determine your success in business, let alone as a content marketer.  Walk your talk.

As you’re producing each individual piece of content, ask yourself the following questions:

 1). Does it promote my brand?

2). Does it detract from my message?

3). Does it create value for others?

4). Does it influence a call to action?

The once-level playing field has skewed in favor of those who write with clarity, present well, and live up to a perceived brand promise. 

What steps are you taking to market your content?

J.D. GERSHBEIN, CEO of OWLISH COMMUNICATIONS, is a specialist in the Art and Science of LinkedIn.  He is a trusted asset to top executives, managers, entrepreneurs, professional service providers, salespeople, and those involved in the search for their next great opportunity.  J.D. offers unrivaled strategic direction to individuals and firms—ranging from small to medium-sized businesses (SMB’s) to Fortune 500 companies— in using LinkedIn to build brand and generate revenue.  Dubbed “LinkedIn’s #1 Brand Ambassador” and “The LinkedIn Black Belt,” J.D. is considered one of the top LinkedIn strategists in the world and a pioneer in the design and delivery of LinkedIn educational programs.  Drawing upon his background in marketing communications, industrial psychology, neuroscience, improvisational comedy and broadcast media, he is helping advance the collective awareness of LinkedIn and inspiring opportunity-oriented professionals in all walks of business.  J.D. is a nationally-known A-list speaker who has been featured on FOX TV News, in the Chicago Tribune, and has guested on prominent coast-to-coast business talk radio programs.  He currently blogs for NBC Chicago and contributes articles on LinkedIn to numerous online publications.  J.D. is also an Adjunct Professor at the Illinois Institute of Technology’s Stuart School of Business where he teaches the school’s first-ever course in social media.  His first book, a treatise on social business communication strategies, is due out early 2012.

In a study of 5,285 leaders from 5 different organizations, we examined the effectiveness of leaders at different levels of the organization. The measure of leadership effectiveness was derived from our research on Extraordinary Leaders. In that research we identified 16 competencies that best explained the differences between poor, good and great leaders.  49 items are used to measure the 16 competencies where assessments are completed by a leader’s manager, peers, direct reports and others.   Results from each organization were examined and the graph below shows the average difference by level.

When we look at the results, leaders at the top of an organization tend to be rated as more effective than their direct reports and their direct reports tend to be rated as more effective than their direct reports.

Leadership Impacts Outcomes

In extensive studies we have demonstrated the clear connection between the effectiveness of a leader and a variety of organizational outcomes.  Great leaders create more profit, higher customer satisfaction, high levels of engagement in their employees, lower turnover and substantially more highly committed employees.

While talking with a group of leaders recently, the question was asked, “How many great leaders do you need in order for an organization to be successful?” One of the leaders commented, “At least one!” While it’s true that one is much better than none, our data clearly shows that the influence of a leader is significantly diminished from one level of the organization to the next. In fact, the influence of a person’s direct manager will always overpower the effectiveness of another leader in the organization. The correct answer to “How many great leaders are needed,” is thatthey all need to be effective. Poor leadership at any level of the organization will have a very negative impact.

High Ceilings

In many organizations, there is an assumption that the top management group does not need much development. While it is true that senior leaders tend to be more effective, executive leaders in our study ranged from the 68^th percentile (a little above average) to the 93^rd percentile (extraordinary). Thus, not all top management is at the top of leadership effectiveness.

Between each tier of management, a leadership effectiveness “gap” exists. The higher tier of management usually has a higher level of leadership effectiveness. The average gap is 14.5 percentile points. Using that as an average metric, if an organization wanted leaders in the 4^th tier down to be at the 50^th percentile (just average) the top level of leaders would need to be at the 94^thpercentile in terms of the average leadership effectiveness. Keep in mind that these leaders establish the height of the ceiling. If their average effectiveness is at the 68^th percentile then the next level will be on average 14.5 percentile points lower.

Top management sets the example for the rest of the organization. In the organizations we have studied, those who have the best leaders always have top management groups fully engaged and participating in leadership development programs. Those with lower levels of leadership effectiveness assume that the top leaders are “good enough.”

Reducing the Gap

When looking at the differences between levels, not every gap was large. Some organizations only had gaps of 3 to 5 percentile points. This small gap created a dramatic shift upward in the effectiveness of leaders. It became apparent that the small gap was a function of several issues.

The first issue was selecting the right people as leaders. When filling various job positions, organizations that analyzed how, rather than what, results were achieved selected more effective leaders.  These talent management processes also emphasized a clear set of desirable leadership competencies and created a common language around those competencies.

Second, the top manager of the organization believed that a significant part of the job was the development of their direct reports. They felt it was their responsibility and not a Training or HR responsibility. Because of this belief, feedback was frequent; training was welcomed and encouraged.

Third, the direct reports of the senior leader felt the same way about their direct reports. In the organization there was a strong emphasis on development of every employee.

Fourth, the bar for effective leadership was set high. The expectation was the leaders needed to be great and not just good.

Cup Half Full or Half Empty

There are two ways to look at this research. The “half empty” view is that leaders are typically less effective than their bosses. This view focuses on the tendency of leaders to hold people back from realizing their potential. The “half full” view is that the more effective a person is as a leader the more effective their direct reports will be. There is a very positive message from this that leaders can pull up the effectiveness of others in the organization.  A good example has a very positive effect in any organization. If you desire great leadership in your organization, then be committed to set your own bar high and be willing to look for ways to improve. The quickest and easiest path to improvement comes from getting focused feedback and then looking for opportunities to build on existing strengths.

Post Written by Joe Folkman

Joe Folkman is the co-founder and President of Zenger Folkman, a leadership development firm focused on building strengths of individuals, teams, and organizations. Joe is a co-author of the recent Harvard Business Review article “Making Yourself Indispensable.” To learn more leadership tips from Joe, subscribe to his leadership blog or follow him on Twitter: @zengerfolkman.

When seeking a mentor, begin with research. Talk to successful people that you know and ask about their mentors or people that they’ve mentored. Ask specific questions about how the mentorship started, what made it work and other ways the mentorship influenced them. Think of what you are looking for in a mentor and make a list of potential candidates. The more informed you are about what you want, the easier it will be to find the right mentor to suit your needs.

Being active in your field will make it a lot easier for a strong mentor to find you. Remain approachable at work, in and outside of your department. The more people that you interact with at work, the better your chances are of finding a mentor there. Take time to get to know people at your company that you don’t work with each day. Take on new projects to showcase your abilities. Be sure to show how much you care about your job. If you are apathetic at work, it will be difficult for someone to want to take the time to teach you.

In addition to utilizing contacts at your present employer, online professional networking sites such as LinkedIn allow you to build networks of contacts throughout your career. Through putting the feelers out for specific mentoring needs, your contacts may be able to suggest one of his or her associates to you. Aside from immediate contacts, consider engaging in more face-to-face contact time. Going to professional conferences may be just the environment you need to find an ideal mentor in your field. Civic organizations that bring professionals together in community projects or regular meetings may also present an opportunity to meet a potential mentor. 

Once you have found a potential mentor, make sure that you are prepared before you ask for a meeting. Your mentor is most likely a very busy person, so be organized with your approach. You will want to have a current résumé available. Be sure it is up to date and accentuates your current success.  You may also want to prepare a brief report that outlines your current professional development plan so that a potential mentor can easily see the benefits of investing time in you. When meeting with the potential mentor, let your enthusiasm for your work show through. Be ready to describe how you show your commitment to your professional projects through concrete examples that illustrate your accomplishments in clear professional language. You will want to show your mentor that you bring a unique contribution to the organization and that you have a track record of putting in the time, effort, creativity and commitment it takes to be a success. 

As a protégé, your job is to actively engage your mentor in a partnership that he or she will also find meaningful. You want to show your commitment to the longevity of the mentorship. Having precise goals can assist both parties in remaining clear about expectations and time commitments. Keep an ongoing dialogue to gauge the effectiveness of the mentoring process. 

If you make yourself visible through proactive networking that, prepare your presentation with supporting documents and allow your personality to shine, then you might end up with a variety of mentors from which to choose!

University Alliance submitted this article on behalf of the online programs at Villanova University. Many people find subject matter experts (SME) as ideal mentors. Villanova University offers leadership training courses led by SME’s with years of experience. In addition to leadership courses, Villanova also offers project management certification and six sigma certification courses for professionals interested in these disciplines.

For the last twenty years in training and organizational development, whenever I am called upon to create and/or facilitate a team building workshop, it is always at the behest of a manager interested in transforming his/her team into a paragon of performance and productivity for the organization. All along, I have assumed that high performing teams were borne out of a leadership vision and brought into reality by team members who bought-into that vision.  The challenge with this belief is the assumption  that high performing teams bloom only from a vision planted and nurtured by the leader. The Orange Revolution reveals how teams can bloom where they are planted and of their own volition.

“…We’re not saying that the managers of teams don’t make a difference–or even that top management doesn’t play a vital role…But the fact is that most people in breakthrough teams report their highest loyalty is their relationship with one another–the other team members” p. 12

Acts of respect, kindness, and support are a fabulous source of power and influence in organizations. By using your talents, resources, and time to recognize others who appreciate and desire such recognition, you build loyal relationships founded on trust and integrity. The beauty of recognition is that it is a gift that can be given by one peer to another just as easily as it is something a manager can endow upon a subordinate.  Following the formula laid out in The Orange Revolution, team members can leverage the power of recognition (among other “goodies” I’ll let you discover for yourself when you read the book) to tighten the weave of the team, increase their degree of influence, and ultimately contribute more to the organization.

 ”We all have more influence than we’ll ever know if we exert that influence for good in our teams. Each revolution starts in the mirror.” Scott O’Neil, President of Madison Square Gardens Sports(p.86)

The Orange Revolution is rich with practical ideas for developing breakthrough teams in conjunction with or even in spite of (sad reality sometimes) the organization’s formal leadership structure. It’s truly empowering–not like those “fake” empowering books that espouse unrealistic actions and activities that don’t stand a snowball’s chance in Flagstaff without management approval. An Orange Revolution can be started by a leader with his/her team or by a team with or without a supportive leader (although the most productive teams are those with high levels of camaraderie and a supportive leader who provides valued recognition).  Thanks to Mr. Gostick and Mr. Elton, there are no more excuses for being “stuck” in a miserable situation or for leading an unproductive team. Get the book. Get unstuck because today is as good a day as any to start a revolution!

*Full disclosure

About a year ago, New Marketing Labs contacted me to be a guest blogger at Carrots.com. They also sent me a copy of  The Orange Revolution. Luckily, it’s a terrific book that I enjoyed and from which I gained tremendous insight. Blogging about it (though about a year later than I had originally intended) is easy because I believe in the book’s tenets and the integrity of the authors. That said, the situation forced me to determine a policy for blogging about books that are sent to me from publishers, publicists, authors, etc.

I will only write about books that:

• I like
• Have merit
• Have a philosophy or set of tools related to the overall intention of this blog (promoting positive influence as the most effective way for leaders to get things done in organizations)
• Are enjoyable to read (there are some books I like but that took such acts of sheer will and determination to finish  I wouldn’t inflict them upon my worst enemy)

 In a nutshell, the Saying What You Mean book review policy is “Picks Only. No Pans.” If I don’t have something nice to say, then I’m not saying anything at all.

While there is no need to re-hash the classic debate on nature vs. nurture I would submit that while certain people may be more predisposed to having entrepreneurial success due to personality, character, life experiences, etc. there are some things that anyone and everyone can do to increase the likelihood of finding success as an entrepreneur.

Here are some of the things that I came up with and please do chime in via the comments below on anything that you would like to add to (or remove from) the list:

#1 A Willingness to Learn

A willingness to learn might even better be termed as a “hunger for learning” because let’s face it – if you start your own business then even if you have a board of advisors (which most small businesses do not have anyway) there will be a lot of things that you will just have to learn on your own. There is no calling your boss for instructions on how to complete a certain task or accomplish a certain goal because YOU are the boss! If you don’t have a healthy appetite for just figuring certain things out as you go along and a willingness to constantly be learning new things then you will likely struggle as an entrepreneur.

#2 A Proper View of Risk

Note that I specifically did not title this “A Love of Risk” or something that maybe is stereotypical when non entrepreneurs describe entrepreneurs. I am of the opinion that, when done a certain way, entrepreneurship is actually less risky then employment. There are many risks inherent to starting a business but there are also many risks inherent in NOT starting a business and relying on an employer for your livelihood.

Regardless, an entrepreneur does deal with different kinds of risk on a daily basis and a cool head, smart decision making skills, and long term planning chops are all positive characteristics of an entrepreneur.

A successful entrepreneur usually has a firm grasp of both personal and business financial principles. Many entrepreneurs, with otherwise great talent and business acumen, have cut short their chance at making their company a success by rushing out to get a business credit card or bank line of credit, not developing a budget, and spending a ton of money on non-essentials; rather than focusing on keeping costs low and growing their business.

#3 A Vision for the Future

While it is perfectly acceptable (and quite common) for most employees to simply plod along and complete their daily tasks without so much as a thought for the day following, this kind of attitude in an entrepreneur often has disastrous consequences. A successful entrepreneur is usually quite adroit at seeing the big picture and focusing on the organization as a whole rather than simply the day to day operations of what the business does. “The E-Myth Revisited” is the classic book that delves deeply into the closely related concept that a successful entrepreneur spends the majority of their time working on their business rather than in their business.

What Other Qualities of a Successful Entrepreneur Would YOU Add?

Are successful entrepreneurs born or made?

What are some additional qualities that you would say are key to being a successful entrepreneur?

How are the qualities important for entrepreneurial success different than say, becoming a successful attorney, accountant, etc?

Author Bio: Joel Ohman is a Certified Financial Planner™ and serial entrepreneur. He is the founder of a number of different financial websites for helping consumers learn about health insurance, car insurance, and other financial topics. He is a first time writer at Saying What You Mean.

Joel Ohman, Guest Blogger

Take a look at the pictures in the gallery above. They are the many faces of influence. Though they come from a variety of backgrounds and manifested their leadership in different ways, each one of them made a choice to be a positive force for change and to use their influence not for self-serving reasons but rather to serve others. Being influential is a way of life. It’s about stepping outside of your comfort zone and investing time in activities and relationships that ultimately contribute to a better world. In addition to a high degree of selflessness, a dedication to building trust, and a willingness to get their hands dirty, influential people take a systematic careful approach to inspiring cooperation from others. Whether an unconscious competence or a learned behavior, effective influencers follow certain steps to motivate individuals and groups. They operate in a way that earns buy-in, establishes trust, and demonstrates respect. In Saying What You Mean’s August post, readers were introduced to this process. It’s called the Positive Influence Method.

The Positive Influence Method is a step by step approach to getting results in a constructive timely manner. The first step in the process is to develop a set of clearly defined, logically prioritized objectives.

Start in the Winner’s Circle

The second of Stephen Covey’s “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” teaches us to begin with the end in mind. Construct a clear image in your mind of what it is you are trying to accomplish. If you’re leading a project or initiative, envision the outcome. In what ways will things be better once your vision becomes a reality? What has changed in the organization? How are people’s lives impacted? How will the environment or work atmosphere be different? What issues, obstacles, or challenges will be removed? What will people be celebrating? Now, capture the vision in clear succinct language. You should be able to communicate this idea in less than five minutes. If it takes you longer than that to get your point across, go back to the drawing board and further refine the message.

Vision DNA

A vision is an edifice constructed out of a set of objectives. Write down the building blocks from which your vision will be assembled. Detail what needs to be accomplished and by whom. This is a valuable list. It gives you measurable milestones to track the progress of your initiative and lets you know who the key players are that you must engage to be successful.

Sort the Big O’s from the Little o’s

In most cases, when we plan for projects or initiatives we organize the objectives or milestones according to dependencies and chronology. “A” can’t happen until “B” is done and it makes the most sense to focus on “C” once “B” is complete. Although an important exercise for planning, this does not necessarily help you when it comes to influencing others to contribute their time and assets to your cause.

For the moment, abandon chronology and dependencies in favor of degree of importance to the overall vision. Sort the list of objectives according to the “must haves” and the “nice to haves.” For example, entertainment at the charity fundraiser is a “must have.” Securing The Dave Matthews Band is a “nice to have.” Begin to work on a compelling case for your “must have” objectives. In future posts, we’ll talk about how these compelling cases can be tailored for the greatest impact. For each group or person with whom you must engage in order to fulfill your vision, determine what you are willing to invest or sacrifice to obtain your “must have” objectives.

Stay Tuned. Next up: Power Inventory

Can’t wait for the next post to find out what to do next? Want to know more sooner than later? Click here to learn more about Positive Influence for Premium Results

Just as the Ground Hog signals the pending transformation from winter to spring, August Light is the harbinger of change from summer to FOOTBALL SEASON!

I know. I can hardly believe it myself. But, it’s time to start blowing the dust off of the gridiron metaphors and crack open the tome of sage advice from players and coaches alike. I’d like to kick off this season with a goody from Tom Landry, long-time coach of the Dallas Cowboys. Coach said,

 “Leadership is getting someone to do what they don’t want to do, to achieve what they want to achieve.”

If you’ve ever tried to convince someone to do something they don’t want to do, even if the end result will be getting what they want, you know that it’s like pushing the proverbial boulder up a hill in Hades. This is largely due to the fact that the likelihood of you forcing your will on the other person has the same odds of success as the temperature dropping below zero in that particular region of the netherworld!

But, in today’s cross-functional world of horizontal organizations chock full of Millenials asking those of us over 40, “Why should I?” it’s imperative for leaders to figure out how to get what we want and need. Long gone are the days when a simple, “Because I said so” was a good enough reason for people to do what the boss wanted them to do. Formal authority doesn’t seem to carry the same weight as it once did. For one thing,  leaders are no longer only in charge of people over whom they wield the power of the paycheck. Besides, while a directive approach may get people to comply in the moment, the impact is short lived. Successful leaders of equally successful organizations know how to earn long-term commitment from others. 

“Nice Guys,” leaders who have followers that actually like, trust, and respect them, know how to get others to want to do what needs to get done.

There is no quick hit way to motivate someone to change his mind and then act upon this newly modified belief. As Dr. Paul Hersey, in the quintessential book on leadership, The Situational Leader tells us, “Influencing the behavior of others should not be thought of as a single event. It’s a full time job in which every minute must be spent wisely.” For a description of this full time job, you may want to take a moment to read an earlier post on I-Style or Influence Style.

I-Style is a way of life. It’s about dedicating yourself to the pursuit of personal influence in order to help shape events and make meaningful contributions to the greater good. This is the everyday life of influence. Inside of this lifestyle, you will encounter specific circumstances that require you to influence particular individuals or groups in order to achieve certain objectives.

For these occasions, the Positive Influence Method is a step by step approach to leveraging trust, credibility, and value in order to get things done in a constructive timely manner. Following is a breakdown of the method. In the coming posts, we’ll take an in-depth look at each component.

Prioritized Objectives

Influence, like all other strategic endeavors, requires a well-thought out plan. Start by clarifying what it is you are trying to accomplish. People will rarely follow a leader who is lost. A set of clearly defined, logically prioritized objectives instill trust and offer proof of your credibility.

Power Inventory

The root of power comes from possessing that which other people desire. Invest the time to assess what others value. Then, consider if you can honestly and ethically provide that value or at least help them find someone who can.

Who to Influence

People whose success depends on positive influence carefully guard their reputation. They surround themselves with like-minded people and dwell in a realm swathed in integrity. When you earn the trust of these individuals, you’ll be amazed at how much easier it is to access resources and get decisions made.

A Mile In Their Shoes

Manipulators often skip this step. Influencers spend most of their time and energy learning the world of the person or people with whom they will be collaborating. Discovering what keeps someone up at night, is a crucial first step toward a long term relationship founded on trust and mutual understanding.

Influence Action Plan

The Influence Action Plan is a blueprint for how you and key people can team-up to apply what you’ve learned toward the pursuit of the objectives you set forth in the first step.

Looking for the Full Monty?

Write Influence partners with the Executive Coaching firm of McGurer & Associates, Inc. to provide business people with the tools and techniques needed to enhance and reap the rewards of personal influence.  

Through a blended learning approach that couples rigorous personal coaching with action-oriented workshops, we equip professionals in high visibility high pressure positions with the interpersonal, political, and marketing skills needed to thrive and succeed as leaders in cross-functional environments. 

We collaborate with clients to create and deliver a customized Positive Influence for Premium Results program that aligns with the most urgent and important business goals facing participants.

For more information about this amazing program, contact us.

Expecting influence to produce infallibility is hoping for the impossible.

While the depth of our humanity has a great deal to do with the strength of our influence it is also the leading cause of most of our blunders. On our way to contribute to the greater good, we often trip over our own intentions. No matter how hard we try to get everything just right, the law of averages tells us that sooner or later something is bound to go wrong. Unfortunately, stomping into a flaming bag of proverbial dog poo tends to trigger an automatic self-flagellation response that is hugely counter-productive. Despite the fact that beating ourselves up for our mistakes feels like the correct response, it is really self-forgiveness that puts us on the road to redemption.

Here is a five part strategy for constructively coping with personal mistakes.

Forgive But Don’t Forget.

The moment a chosen course of action takes a turn for the worst the body senses trouble long before reality hits the conscious mind. The stomach takes a plummeting dive for cover. As all the blood rushes to the cheeks, the face gives off heat that makes the scalp sweat. By the time the palms start getting good and clammy, the mind is aware of what’s happening and becomes consumed with panic, shame, and guilt. In this state, all of the body’s resources are directed toward instinctual reaction leaving very little energy for processing and reason. Though natural, this response actually prevents us from remedying the situation.

Next time you realize you’ve made a mistake, start the coping process by taking a deep breath. Then, forgive yourself.  Keep in mind that while it’s smart not to paddle around in a pool of guilt, you are not off the hook. Forgive yourself for making the mistake while holding yourself accountable for the consequences.

Don’t fight. Be Contrite.

The late great John Wooden wrote about what his father called “Two Sets of Threes.” They are simple rules of conduct. The first set is “Never lie. Never Cheat. Never steal.” The second set provides the perfect explanation for how to cope with adversity. They are, “Don’t whine. Don’t complain. Don’t make excuses.” Coach Wooden described the “Two Sets of Threes” as his compass for doing the right thing. Let them be your guide when you find yourself on the stinky end of a bad choice.

Try this. The next time something goes wrong, (believe me there will be a next time), forego the detailed explanations, finger pointing (intentional or inadvertent), and rationalizing. Instead, say these words: “I am sorry.” Notice, this sentence tells the story without the need for a preface or an epilogue. Let it be a sincere statement of contrition unmarred by the stains of weaker less healing words.

Options & Ears Open.

After you’ve forgiven yourself and shared a simple statement of regret with the offended party, it’s time to put an action plan in motion. Bring well thought out options to the table. Incidentally, if you do manage to figure how to turn back time and eradicate mistakes from the collective consciousness, please do share! We’ll even let you blog about it here!

A willingness to share and implement plans for mitigating the damage and addressing the consequences of your error brings your apology to life. Backing up your words with meaningful results-driven deeds goes a long way to earning back the trust of those affected by your mistake.

Active listening leads to reparation. Prepare options but keep an open mind to alternative solutions. Give the others involved in the situation a forum to share their feelings and discuss ideas. Your suggestions for fixing things are intended as a peace offering; not the be-all end-all to the situation. It’s easy to get caught in the mental trap of thinking that the only way to regain people’s trust is to be the one to solve the problem. Hard work and joining in a team effort to clean up the mess earn more trust than a heroic single-handed attempt to save the day.

Unforgiven.

Accept the fact that at the end of the day, you may be the only person who forgives you. Humble remorse, willing accountability, and an earnest attempt to collaborate on a remedy give you a fighting chance at securing forgiveness and rebuilding trust. They are not guarantees. Those affected by your erroneous actions may still choose not to forgive you or they may forgive but refuse to forget. Respect their choice.

Live and Learn.

Regardless of whether you receive absolution from others, make sure you’ve gleaned whatever lessons are available from the experience. The best way to prevent history from repeating itself is to capture the lessons in a place you can reference frequently. Develop a personal plan for applying them in other areas of your work and life.

An influential leader gets back on the horse a wiser rider than when she fell.

Little more than a decade later, I can’t tell you the outrageous sense of accomplishment I felt when I was promoted to a management position at the tender age of 26. Joy gave way to dismay when I quickly learned that a loyal band of followers did not come with the pay raise and title. By the end of the journey from insecure teenager to a position at the upper level of personal incompetence, an almost obsessive interest in the dynamics of social power hatched and spread its wings in the aviary of my intellectual curiosity.

I went on a mission to understand the difference between the leader who turns around to find a line of followers and the person who turns around only to see their own shadow. Based on my research, graduate school courses, observations of successful effective leaders, and personal experiences as a leader who earned a loyal following, I can tell you that it is imperative for professionals who care about their performance to become students of influence.

Whether we are in finance, IT, HR, management, advertising, marketing, project management, leading cross functional teams or selling shoes at Macy’s our success is going to depend on convincing one, ten, hundreds, or millions of other people to commit to and actually take a particular action.

If you are not sure committing to an influence-improvement program is worth your time, consider the top three reasons why influence is a key ingredient to professional success.

#3 People want someone to believe in and want someone to believe in them

Although natural charisma comes with a lifetime supply of influence, social power can be developed in the absence of such innate gifts. With or without the turbo-boost from charisma, people who use their influence with positive intentions to benefit the greater good do so by establishing their credibility, building trusting relationships, and adding value wherever and whenever possible.

The desires to belong in community, make constructive contributions, have our voices be heard, and be recognized for our efforts drive our attitudes, actions, and output. When these desires are met, we are at our best. When one or all are neglected, productivity and quality of work suffers. By virtue of their high levels of credibility, trust, and perceived value, influencers are able to leverage their social power to fulfill these desires; thereby unlocking individual and group potential and setting the stage for optimum performance.

#2 Bridging Gaps Leads to Indispensability

In the game Jenga, players take turns trying to remove blocks from a tall stack of interconnected pieces without toppling the structure. Some pieces slide out easily. Some pieces are immovable because they are embedded in and vital to the stability of the tower’s infrastructure. What would happen if you were slid out of your role? Would the world in which you work tumble to the ground? Or, would it be weeks before somebody pointed to your desk and casually asked “Hey, where’d she go?”

A tremendous source of influence comes from actively seeking out and filling structural holes. Making valuable connections between groups, taking on neglected tasks (even if they fall outside job parameters), and being available to lend a hand increase personal influence and secure a reputation of indispensability to an organization.

#1 Influencers get results

Like teaching a group of phobic toddlers to swim, we always have the option to throw our charges kicking and screaming into the deep end, immersing them in the world of our objectives and opinions. Although they’ll get wet, they will also beat a hasty retreat from the water never to return and never to trust us again.

The influencer’s approach is to motivate the aqua-phobic to willingly dive into and paddle around in a pool of our ideas. Taking the time to listen to their concerns, communicate messages using their terminology, and help them draw their own conclusions earns us the trust needed to lead a target audience away from the fear of the unknown and toward the personal conviction that learning to swim is a worthwhile pursuit.

Though less expedient than most “sink or swim” persuasion techniques, using influence to motivate others to commit to specific actions produces better results with almost no negative side-effects.